I was sitting in Isabel’s living room in London, recounting an incident that had filled me with rage. I can’t remember the incident itself, but I can clearly recall the conversation I had with Isa. Me, ranting on and on and ON about something dreadful someone had said. Isa saying that this person’s behaviour was out of my control and that I should simply send them blessings and move on. WTF! (Sorry Isa, but that’s what I thought.) Sending blessings to someone who’s been utterly dreadful to me? Nope.

Never. Gonna. Happen.

Fast forward to eight or so years later and here I am, in a pale green bedroom with a meditation cushion on which I sit (almost) daily in prayer (if you can call it that), before sending blessings to those whose actions have wounded me.

Before you read on, head’s up… I’m going to be talking about God. I know many people have an issue with the notion of God. (For many years, I did.) Please don’t throw the baby out with the bath water. Instead, keep reading and substitute God with whatever/whomever you consider to be the higher power. Divine, Truth, Nature, Source … whatever works for you.

I found God a while back.

My version of God, that is.

It happened accidentally and I couldn’t undo it. Until recently, I didn’t actually use the word God, though. I wasn’t — I am not — religious. I didn’t want to confuse myself, or others. My God was (and is) the Universe. That thing that is much, much bigger than me. Bigger than all of us.

That thing I have, over the past few years, come to trust as a guardian that wishes me no harm and a guide that shows me the way just when I think I’ve lost it.

As I became more and more comfortable with this new relationship, the word God began to roll more easily from my tongue. It doesn’t matter what it means to anyone else, as long as I know what it means to me. Furthermore, it’s short and sweet and it allows me to remind myself (quickly) that I am in good hands.

When anxiety strikes (and it strikes fairly frequently these days), I repeat these words to myself: God is love. I say it over and over again. With each repetition, my breathing becomes more and more even. I keep going until the fluttering in my heart and stomach stops.

sending love 1

We are each a teeny, tiny part of the Universe.

That is my belief.

On the flip-side, a teeny, tiny part of the Universe is within each of us. If you follow my thinking (I’m not asking you to agree with it), this means that a teeny, tiny part of God is within all of us, and, on the flip-side, that we are each a teeny, tiny part of God.

This concept is relatively new to me and it’s why I now find myself sending blessings to others, which, trust me, is something I never thought I’d do in a million, gazillion years.

I used to get really wound up when people sent me blessings. There was one person in particular who would sign off every note with the word blessings — as if blessings were his to give. (For some reason, the term God bless never had me up and arms. Perhaps because the blessings were being attributed to God.)

Who are YOU to bless me, I’d think, outraged by his sense of self-importance. I don’t think that way anymore.

I believe we all have a little bit of God in us, which means we all have a little bit of God’s love to give, and that’s what blessings are: God’s love.

The ritual of sending blessings is a gift you can give yourself.

While you’ll never know for certain whether the blessings you send out actually shine any light on those they’re intended for, they will, with absolute certainty, help shine a light on you.

In order to send blessings from your heart, you must first take yourself to a place where you can feel God’s love and light surround you. If what I’ve written above resonates with you, then you, like me, probably trust that God loves you no more or less than he or she loves anybody else.

As a teeny, weeny piece of God yourself, it makes sense that you can do the same, i.e. love (but not necessarily like) all people equally. From this place of love, you are better able to understand that any sticks and stones thrown your way are born from someone else’s pain — someone who, as far as the Universe is concerned, is no different from you and therefore equally worthy of love. And it is from here that you will find yourself able to send blessings their way. And when you’re sending blessings, there will be no room in your heart for the toxicity that is hate. There will only be room for love, and at the end of the day, that feels good.

– The Buddhist Metta (Loving Kindness) Prayer –

Is someone treating you unkindly right now?

If so, are you willing to try choosing love as your response? You don’t have to verbally give it to choose it. It is enough simply to feel it.

One person I’ve been sending daily blessings to has no idea that I’m doing it. It doesn’t matter. I do it anyway because it enables me to replace the darkness of my resentment with the light of my love.

If you’re not ready, that’s ok. When I sat in Isa’s living room all those years ago, I wasn’t ready either.  I have to be honest though. Had I found myself ready sooner, I could have spared myself a whole lot of heartache. I guess that’s the bottom line. We have to be ready, really ready, to let the heartache go.

If you’re clinging to despair, ask yourself why it is you’re so unwilling to let go of your aching heart. How is it serving you? A better question: how would it feel to wake up tomorrow with a heart full of love?

Viv for Today xo

Before you go …

I believe things happen for a reason. You landed on this page because you’re open to becoming a more authentic, fulfilled and self-aware human being.  So am I. Let’s do this together. Before you leave, take a moment to sign up for MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER so we can keep in touch.