You have the power of choice. Are you using it?

Do you feel hopelessly stuck — in the wrong city, the wrong job, or perhaps the wrong relationship? If so, what’s keeping you there? Making decisions is hard, but here’s the thing: you have the power of choice. Always. Even if you feel helpless; like everything is beyond your control; even if you have a list as long as your arm justifying why you’re paralyzed in whatever situation you find yourself.  You get to choose the next step.

Sometimes you get to choose between bad and good. Sometimes between bad and slightly better. And sometimes you have to choose the better of two evils, but you always get to decide the next step.

If you don’t want to be a victim of circumstance, owning your power of choice is essential.

Says Caroline Myss in her Ted Talk, Choices That Change Your Life:

Choice is the most powerful thing we got going for us and we know it. And that’s the reason why we’re terrified to make a choice.

Every time we choose one option, we decline another. Yes to Italian means no to Indian. So what do we say when a friend asks where we want to go for dinner? We say, “I don’t mind. You choose!”

“Choice terrifies people,” says Caroline, “so most people will do anything to postpone making choices.” As a result, we end up accepting the status quo, or worse, staying in situations that can be detrimental to our physical or emotional wellbeing.

Given the consequences, why aren’t we exercising our power to choose more often? Perhaps because we find it exhausting. According to researchers at Cornell University, the average adult makes more than 35,000 decisions every single day. Every one of those choices has an outcome. 

Fortunately, there are three choices you can make RIGHT NOW to simplify all future-decision making. 

Caroline shares these in her Ted Talk. I highly recommend you take 25 minutes to give it a watch (keep scrolling). But if you can only spare two or three minutes right now, here they are in a nutshell:

Choice #1: Live with integrity.

Decide RIGHT NOW that you’re going to make decisions based on what you truly believe. This means treating yourself in accordance with your beliefs and treating others in accordance with those same beliefs.

If you don’t want to be walked on, don’t allow yourself to be walked on. Similarly, don’t walk on others. If you don’t want to be lied to, don’t tolerate lying. Similarly, don’t lie to others. You have the power of choice. Exercising it with integrity doesn’t allow for double standards.

Step out of your integrity and sure, you can probably find a way to justify your actions but, says Caroline, “your body knows you did that. Your mind knows you did that; your heart and soul knows you did that. So you know you did that.”

Choice #2: Share your wisdom, not your suffering.

In one way or another, you have no doubt suffered. There’s nothing light about suffering. Furthermore, your suffering doesn’t become lighter when you choose to burden others with your pain. 

Your suffering may be greater than the suffering of others. It isn’t fair. It will never be fair. Even if you impose it on your children, the suffering you’ve endured will still not be fair, so why do it?

Making decisions from a place of poor me is a choice you are free to make. Alternatively, you can choose to gift others with the wisdom you have gained through your suffering.  

Choice #3: Take risks.

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself.

I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. 

I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

These are among the most common regrets people have on their deathbeds. The only way to avoid such regrets is to take risks. This doesn’t mean you have to go bungee jumping. (Even I wouldn’t risk that!) It simply means you shouldn’t make decisions based on fear, like the fear of being wrong, humiliated, alone.

Says Caroline, “don’t take the safe path…don’t look backwards for guidance…The reason you are where you are is because that part of your life is over.” If you make decisions today based on what was, you are quite likely making choices on what is no more — because back then is over.

So let me ask you this about that city, job, or relationship you no longer feel you belong in. In fact, let me ask you this about any decision you’re currently struggling to make. What would you choose to do if you were to let go of the fear and make the call, right now, to live with integrity, share your wisdom, and take a risk?

The power of choice is yours.

Viv for Today xo

Before you go …

I believe things happen for a reason. You landed on this page because you’re open to becoming a more authentic, fulfilled and self-aware human being.  So am I. Let’s do this together. Before you leave, take a moment to sign up for MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER so we can keep in touch.